After the 3rd day of sleeping in until 2 and eating packaged baked goods from 7/11 for breakfast I decided it was time to do something else. I am on a 10 day vacation from classes being it is Chinese New Year. This is the biggest celebration in Asia. And I figured: I have time, why not do something impulsive?
The impulsive behavior erupted out of the fact that I originally had a nice plan. A plan that my Chinese teacher, who assigned the report (due when we are back from vacation) about what we do for Chinese New Year would have L-O-V-E-D. The original plan was to spend the New Year with a conservative Taiwanese family---my EX!boyfriend's family. We could have done all the usual stuff...wholesome and oh-so Chinese: 打麻將啊，貼春聯啊,跟友戚團圓啊，拿紅包啊，說恭喜發財啊, play majong, hang up New Year Scrolls, reunite with family, receive/give red envelops (they have money inside yo!), and say, "Congratulations, get rich!" (Which is probably a really bad translation of 恭喜發財Chinese-speakers please cut in now.)
But, NO! I opted for something else. Something that reeks of debauchery. That is right! So the past three weeks have been those of pure 復雜 complications. And that is because I fell for a guy...and he is not my boyfriend....and well it is REALLY REALLY complicated. But suffice it to say that it really is like a Taiwanese drama---but since it would be written by a Taiwanese person I am probably painted as the "bad guy(girl)" and my shallow膚淺, cheapskate小氣鬼, of an ex-boyfriend is the "tragic hero." Regardless of the roles we would play---for real the ex- had to go. It was all good while it lasted.
So, fast forward to a few days ago: NOTHING to do!!!! SO I rock the impulsive: I am going to go by myself to Taibei and I am, diva-style taking the most expensive form of transportation---高鐵 The High Speed Rail (HSR). Fuck yeah. And it is high speed. And fucking comfortable. It is pretty much worth it if I must say it. If you buy it on a whim and without opting for cheaper times to ride, the tickets cost you around 45 USD one-way. And it gets you across this island in about an hour and a half. All I had to do was ride Kaohsiung's subway to HSR and then the HSR to Taibei's subway and finally right to my hostel. I was sitting in Taibei hostel 2 hours after I left my dorm room in Kaohsiung. Pretty smooth...pretty smooth.
The Taipei hostel is an amazing hostel and I highly recommend it to all those who are going to Taibei. I paid $500 TB or roughly $15 bucks USD a night for a single room. And they actually gave me a double because no one was around. It is in central Taibei and a short walk from the subway station. I like it because you tend to meet a lot of interesting travelers and get wasted with them on a roof top veranda overlooking the sky scape.
I arrive and see a friend "uncle Kevin" who has been living at the hostel. After a warm welcome he suggested that I head to the Chiang Kai-Shek Memorial 國立中正紀念堂. Armed with an umbrella (that would become my faithful travel companion later in this trip) I walked the 7 minutes to the memorial stopping on the way to order some breakfast food. It still surprises me to find the lone hot dog in my noodles. I don't know what it is with Taiwanese food but once in a while you find hot dogs in the most random food, (curry, noodle dishes, rice, etc...). It is about half the size of a an "American style" hot dog, usually not cut up, just a lone weenier. It tastes the same as a normal hot dog, nothing special, but what the fuck is it doing in my curry?
I will call The Chiang Kai-Shek Memorial (along with the National Concert Hall國家音樂廳 and National Theater 國家戲劇院) "Taiwan's Tienanmen Square." Who likes over simplified comparisons? ME! I say this because it does just what hero-worship awe-inspiring places are are supposed to do: make you say, "ooooooooo and ahhhh." And if you are me you think, "Whoa it is crazy that all around the world tax dollars are used to build monuments to honor a men of questionable moral integrity." And then as I stand in the middle of meandering tiles stretching the span of 3 football fields, getting dizzy, a lone foreigner among families and friends, I remember this place is not about Chiang Kai-Shek. And even if it is HIS memorial it is not like this diva hasn't made some mistakes that could possibly mar her own integrity. (However my mistakes have not cost anyone their life nor am I the leader of a nation state. Just a few broken hearts...etc. Further more, my mistakes are not in the name of capitalism either...in the name of lust? Is that any better? Probably not. Moving on.)
Now to the big house, the place of all worship...Chiang Kai-Shek's statue. I meet an elderly man of unknown nationality who wants me to take his picture. At first I thought he was Taiwanese or at least a Chinese speaker. But he couldn't(or didn't) respond when I spoke Chinese and he didn't speak English either. He was adorable and he made me take quite a few different shots until I got the right angle he liked---a photo shoot using sign language.
It is funny because in my opinion, 蔣介石 Chiang Kai-Shek, the first president of the Taiwan, is a crook who perverted the idea of democracy and upheld totalitarianism along with fierce capitalist market. Basically a real fuck-face. But god damn, his statue is so cute. He looks warm and fuzzy---a real nice guy. There he is with his cute yet wise smile, the words democracy printed in large letters over his head. I personally like my democracy with a little martial law on the side. Yes Mr. Generalissimo, you want to destroy democracy but I would love love love to have a beer with you...oh shit wait...never mind, no more Bush references.
And like what is up with this sign? Oh shit...good thing I wore my Sunday best. This actually wasn't where anyone could see it. It was on the back of another sign showing where the bathrooms were. But I stumbled (aka almost ran into this sign) upon on it and though it was amazing.
Also visited a beautiful garden in back of Chiang Kai-shek's memorial. So peaceful. I took a walk, discovered a bed of pineapples. Was amused by two aspects: 1.)Who knew pineapples grew underground? Shit, I thought pineapples were from trees and I ain't ashamed to say so. 2.)I wouldn't have know these were pineapples unless I could read Chinese. For once, Chinese was straight forward. Thank god! Fuck Binomial nomenclature! Who the fuck gets that shit?
This was probably my favorite part of Taibei. The mood in this garden was so happy and warm. Being the Chinese New Year (comparable to our western Christmas and New Year) everyone was greeting each other and in a celebratory mood. I greeted a middle aged Taiwanese man. After he got over the surprise that I said, 春節快樂，恭喜發財！"Happy New Year! May you prosper in the new year! (still not confident on that translation)He raised his hands to sky, mouth open wide in a half smile half laugh and yelled toward the heavens, "YEAH! 恭喜發財！恭喜發財！！！！！”Quite a nice walk in the park. Nice, considering it would be the last view of sun I would see for the next 3 days. Also the last time for my whole trip to Taibei that my feet would be dry and warm.
And then there were the hand painted lamps. I thought of my mom when I saw these. Maybe because many of them were red. I thought she would have enjoyed this part a lot.
As I return back to main square a man runs up to me and asks me in English if he can get his picture with me. Since I am in the best mood ever, I respond in Chinese, "Sure, but can I ask you, is this because I am a foreigner?" To which he responds in Chinese, "I am a foreigner too. It is actually because you are pretty." So what the hell? Photo opt for Vietnam and U.S. peace relations. I like the picture of me with this gentlemen because although you can't see it he is actually holding my hand. Hence my facial expression/surprised laughter. His friends also joined in the fun. The war was brought up (not by me, surprise, surprise) and apologies were made and accepted. Then one of the friends, a woman, asks me out of the blue, "哪一個which one?" Which really confused me, as it could mean anything. So after some clarification I realize she is talking about the guys and asking me which one I want. What kind of party is this? I sheepishly say I have a lunch date and that I must be on my way.
The rain started (and would not stop for the rest of my stay.)I meet up with my Australian friend, Zak in 西門町 XiMen Ding, a shopping area in Tabei. This place is actually really hip. Hip enough to make me feel under-dressed and old. Say whaaaat? But it was fun, I dance around in the rain, looked at mass amounts of shoes, was flattered by a sales woman into buying a mesh sweater (cute!), made some Taiwanese dudes blush, and then we decided to move into the "gay district" to grab some eats (I actually just drank beer.) Flirted with the HOT host (he was soooo looking at me, confirmed by my friend too) at the gay bar across the way. Then it occurred to me that he might be gay...and then like what? Do I look like a man? The answer is yes. I am about as manly as most Taiwanese dudes under 30. Ok...sorry that was a low blow. We find some stalls selling odds and ends. Fucking trendy ass jewelry. And those of you from PDX, so Portland it killed me and made me homesick. Would have held their own at most over-priced clothing boutiques in PDX and for sure at Last Thursday. And so I JUST HAD TO BUY SOME STUFF! Hanz and Emma you got some rad jewelry coming your way---handmade by some FABULOUS queens straight out of Taibei. Fuck yes. Made friends with these fellas. Tried hitting on the one in the black hat. Asked the boss, "他也喜歡男生嗎？So does he like boys too?" Answer, "maybe." Damn.
That night I hang out with a mixed Euro-crowd, tried to explain why Americans are bad at geography, drank a pint a whiskey and a couple bottles of Taiwan beer and THEN decided I want to go dancing. It might be because the Korean dudes showed up. Quite possibly the shiest people I have ever met but we went out anyway. So yeah, good men. I scared them half to death with my 活潑和我直接的個性 my liveliness and my very direct way of speaking. But thank the gods they took care of me (and REALLY REALLY could dance. I am done with that stereotype that Asians can't dance. Period. I promise!) But what transpired was naughty and more alcohol was added. Uh oh! Danced my ass off...saw a beautiful Taiwanese dude just watching me and not dancing at all. He looked slightly grumpy. So I point at him and dance my way over to him and then, he smiles. Alright. Next thing I know: making out, dancing, heading outside. Asking him if he is Tai Ke. “你是臺客嗎?” Tai Ke is a bit hard to explain,just suffice it to say they are the delinquents of Taiwan. Answer: "yeah." I am very excited by this. I try to make him eat breakfast with me. "Are you hungry? Lets eat together! Let me buy you some breakfast! You look too skinny you really ought to eat." I am getting his number. And then my Korean friends are like, "Oh no, uh, wait you aren't leaving with him are you?" Bless their hearts, they pull me aside and try to talk some sense into me. And then I turn around to try to finish getting sexy Tai Ke's number and he is GONE. The disapointment of my drunken ass was immense. The rest of the night consisted of more dancing, drinking, sitting with some drunken Taiwanese guys as they move in and out of consciousness outside the club “同學這個地方不適合睡覺嘛", feet hurt, cab back to the Hostel with Korean group, recap my night with the cab driver and cry. He gives me a discount on cab fare.
The next day I wake up late, head hurting, need COFFEE or I will kill someone. I am feeling less like I am heat than the day before. DAMN. Maybe getting ditched by sexy Tai Ke hurt the ego enough to calm my sex drive. Meet a friend at 龍山寺 Long Shan Temple. Settle for 7/11's coffee (in the most westernized city in Taiwan that actually does have good coffee. Somewhere? Just not near the temple so a little part of me dies.) Eat stinky tofu for breakfast. Thankful the fact that it isn't raining---that hard.
Part with my friend, feeling slightly like a rung-out rag. Decide to go by my lonesome to vist 臺北孔廟 Taibei Confucious Temple. It is raining pretty steady. Tempautre is cool. Portland's winter weather. Smells like Portland (with the stink of Taiwanese food and the poor sewage system added), feels like a Portland type of day, but the people and culture are not Portland. I walk around the temple, which althugh is quite beautiful and alive (folks praying and what not)I feel like a total outsider. It is like I put this temple in an aquarium and brought it into the local middle school, "observe class, this is a Chinese spiritual practice." Wax figures of Confucious, people holding insence sticks and bowing to shrines rich with fruit offerings, ringing of an oversized bell. I go and buy a hot coffee at "Confucious' cafe" (China's first teacher liked his coffee too I guess) and watch an older man feeding a squirrel nuts. He is watching me too---as if he wants to say something but isn't sure if I will understand. I want to talk to him too, but I am pretty sure that I will break out into tears because he really reminds me of my dad. And then I go into this little garden behind the temple and the rain continues and the cup of coffee is warming my hands just so...and this time I can't help myself, and I just cry. ALthough I am the only one in the garden besides a woman practicing Tai Chi, I try not to make it obvious that I am crying and just sorta let the tears roll down naturally (no crazy sobbing.) "Mom always said that this will make me feel better," I think to myself while I focus on the circular dragon-horse painting at the end of the bridge.
This is the first time yet I have felt homesick enough to cry in Taiwan. Before, when I considered going home early it was all because at that time I couldn't stand Taiwan. But this experience at a confucious temple was pure homesickness. I just wanted to be near friends and family. I wanted the USA. But most importantly Portland, OR. I want breakfast that kicks ass, art, friends, music, bridges, well fed, happy animals, clean air, liberal politics, well maintained sidewalks, community organizing, women's bookstore, park blocks, dive bars, ecentric people, interesting conversations, amazing local beer....and ok,you get it.
I return to the hostel, cold and wet (canvas shoes: not so good in the rain.) I decide to take a nap. The hostel is right next to a pretty large Buddhist temple, Shan-dao Temple 善導寺 so I am laying there listening to Buddist chants and pondering whether I ought to stay another year in Taiwan. Is this just in another honeymoon phase? Do I want to spend my life working with this language and culture? And I fall asleep and have this dream: My Taiwanese lover is moving out of his appartment (actually true) and leaving Kaohsiung and he tells me I should rent his apartment. I am like ok I am going to check it out. So I go there and it is this red hallway with orange lighting, rather dark. And I am walking up these stairs, floor after floor. And as I go the hallways and stairwells keep getting smaller and smaller. I finally get to his old room and I am crouched down (practically squating) and the door is about a foot and a half high. I am starting to feel clousterphobic but I still feel compelled to rant outloud, sort of like when I first got to Taiwan and was having very bad culture shock. I would just rant to anyone that would listen like a pissed off mad woman. Anyway, in my dream I go off saying, "I don't remember Taiwanese being this small. What the fuck is up with this? What if I 'big foreigner' wants to rent this room? If you want freakishly small rooms why not get your own damn building and call it 'small people's villa'?" And at the end of the dream I said to myself, "I am just too big for all this. I just don't fit." And I was focused on that when I woke up. I don't fit. And needless to say (maybe needless to say) my lover is of a normal man's proportions. And his door in real life is not 1 foot and a half tall.
I went to bed early that night. Spend the next day in the rain---wet and bored at more tourist sights. And then that night I meet the sexy Italian travel companion who wanted to go south. He is staying at the hostel because he is set to PHD research in Taibei. But he has a few days left of vacation so we decide to flee from the rain together.
A night spent in Kaohsiung and my Italian companion and I plan to meet at Kaohsiung mainstation at 9AM the next day. The plan is to go to Kending, a tropical beach paradise a couple hours south of Kaohsiung. But unfortunatly we are standing in the rain, it followed us south, reporting to each other that everyone we talked to advised us NOT to go to Kending. So what to do? This cab driver approaches me and asks if I am going to Kending and I tell him we are thinking of going to the Taroko Gorge 太魯閣. He was incredibly helpful, gave me a map,dirrects me to Hualian 花蓮, and told me to take the train because it was the best way. God bless Taiwan sometimes. What kind of cab driver tells you to take a train?
Called Taiwanese lover who said that it was too far to go to Hua Lian and that it was a bad idea. I told him that we were already on the train so it was too late. Rode the "fast" train (to be confused with with the HSR) for about 5 hours. Made it to HuaLian. Charming town, ate good sea food, drank some beer. Raining a bit still. But I told my travel companion that I think delusional thinking is the best, so I kept saying, "Can't wait until tomorrow's sunshine!"
And guess what? The next day was clear and sunny. Felt super accomplished this trip because I got to use the Chinese skills to get to places I had no idea how to go. I talked to information desk in Hua Lian about getting to a little town right in the middle of the Toroko Gorge called Tian Xiang 天祥. They helped me figure out what bus to ride, listed some hikes, and called for me to reserve a room at a hostel there. This was a success and a testament to the fact that maybe I can learn this language. To give it some perspective when I first got to Taiwan, I had trouble ordering a drink in Chinese. Coming along...coming along...慢慢來.
Took a bus along a winding mountian road much like the ones the US probably had back in the 50's, a bit unsafe and pretty narrow. And the bus if I remember right, was not an automatic. Saaaaay whaaaat? An hour and half later of the most amazing scenery I had seen in a looooongggg time, we arive Tian Xiang. Really rivals Columbia gorge! And I say that with confidence! Beautful...the pictures do no justice!!! For real. The pictures practically make the gorge look ugly. We stayed in a protestant church's hostel. It was created by a bunch of Germans. And it was the cutest place I have ever stayed. I had a thought of seeing if I could convert and just stay there forever. That would be sweet.
But I did eventually make it back to Kaohsiung. And for impulsive, one-woman journey to Taibei, my Chinese New Year didn't turn out half bad. Moral of the story: no canvas shoes in the rain. Also, still waiting on a dream interuptation. Any guesses?
PS-If these photos aren't showing up for ya'll please let me know. Thanks!
